uglypickle:

I reply to peoples texts way too fast that its actually embarrassing

(Source: uglypickle, via departured)

"

I read several dozen stories a year from miserable, lonely guys who insist that women won’t come near them despite the fact that they are just the nicest guys in the world.

..I’m asking what do you offer? Are you smart? Funny? Interesting? Talented? Ambitious? Creative? OK, now what do you do to demonstrate those attributes to the world? Don’t say that you’re a nice guy — that’s the bare minimum.

“Well, I’m not sexist or racist or greedy or shallow or abusive! Not like those other douchebags!”

I’m sorry, I know that this is hard to hear, but if all you can do is list a bunch of faults you don’t have, then back the fuck away..

..Don’t complain about how girls fall for jerks; they fall for those jerks because those jerks have other things they can offer. “But I’m a great listener!” Are you? Because you’re willing to sit quietly in exchange for the chance to be in the proximity of a pretty girl (and spend every second imagining how soft her skin must be)? Well guess what, there’s another guy in her life who also knows how to do that, and he can play the guitar. Saying that you’re a nice guy is like a restaurant whose only selling point is that the food doesn’t make you sick. You’re like a new movie whose title is This Movie Is in English, and its tagline is “The actors are clearly visible”.

"

— David Wong, 6 Harsh Truths That Will Make You a Better Person  (via coolgrandpa)

(Source: violetmaps, via punacceptable)


'Guardians of the Galaxy' premieres at the Dolby Theatre in Hollywood.

'Guardians of the Galaxy' premieres at the Dolby Theatre in Hollywood.

(Source: chrisprattdelicious, via choctawaukerman)

radcanine:

Tell me a bedtime story

radcanine:

Tell me a bedtime story

(Source: awwww-cute, via epic-humor)

ventusthecorgi:

Class was canceled.. and nobody told me?! :(

ventusthecorgi:

Class was canceled.. and nobody told me?! :(

(via thesousabone)

"Please teach me what it’s like to feel beautiful,
because I haven’t felt it in years. The last time
I felt pretty was when I was dancing around in
my new princess dress on my sixth birthday,
ever since then I forgot what it was like to
look in a mirror and feel okay. I’ve forgotten
what beauty is after years of covering my face
with this mask I call makeup, and people tell
me all the time that without the black shit
around my eyes, I would look better. They
say I don’t need pink blush on my skin
because when I’m smiling the apples of my
cheeks are redder than ever. They say that
when I wipe off the red lipstick, the natural
stain of my lips are better than the bright
blood color gloss. Yet they don’t know that
every time they say I don’t need makeup,
that I look better without it, it is a stab to my
heart.. I only ever feel confident with it, and
if I don’t even “need” it, then what do I need?
If they saw me without it they’d say, “oh, maybe
add a little mascara, you know, to brighten
your eyes.” So it’s a game that I can’t win.
I just want to know what it feels like to be
beautiful without this paint on my face,
without my hair sprayed in place, without
needing assurance from someone saying it."

i.c. // i want to feel pretty again (via delicatepoetry)

(via xkillerkayx)

shutupaubrey:

i’m skilled in the culinary art of microwaving 

(via retiredjesus)

princexposition:

when ur mom says you need to get a job but u know ur not ready

image

(via retiredjesus)

(Source: tinarannosaurus, via lolzpicx)

(Source: awwww-cute, via epic-humor)

aconsultingwarlock:

itsajensenthing:

starlit-notes:

I would like to thank my arms, for always being by side. My legs, for always supporting me, and my fingers…because I can always count on them.

this will be my speech when i win an oscar

Don’t forget the hips, for not lying. 

(Source: ohrendelle, via departured)

"There are two reasons why people don’t talk about things; either it doesn’t mean anything to them, or it means everything"

Luna Adriana (via a-s-h-e)

(Source: silly-luv, via loveyourghosts)

(Source: gifcraft, via bonus)